To be brave

And the song I was writing is left undone

01
Anonymous

Tell me the truth, what made you start liking the person you like right now?

I am calling them right now. And getting nervous (i only call people i really like, i hate phone calls). I’m not exactly sure ‘what made me start’ liking them, but they are certainly beautiful (i don’t just mean aesthetically, which they are also *cha ching*). I think this person is pretty darn rare though. It’s hard to place a finger on these things sometimes. I love the way they think and speak and write and dance and i’m not going to ramble. But. Yep… I think i knew i liked them when i met up with their house-mate to inspect their room (which was up for sublease in Sydney). I abandoned the housemate, and we decided to grab lunch afterward and i thought it was really nice (we went to two different places around Marrickville). They told me i should move in, but they also told me that they were going on a date with someone and i said that they should and so i was all confused (and annoyed at myself) but i didn’t mind too much (fml (my awkward life) haha

The goal is to understand your true self before launching an action plan. Deep realizations about yourself don’t come all in one sitting. Be your own ethnographer for a month. One of the people that I admire most in the world is Jane Goodall. Imagine Jane sitting in the forest, looking at those chimpanzees with compassion and curiosity. Take on her kind tone and attitude while observing yourself. Be gentle and curious but never judgmental. This is very hard for us to do because we’re always talking shit to ourselves.

Take a notebook and notice every time you get excited about something. It doesn’t have to be a big moment or work related… Just write it down each time—no judgments. What happens over the course of the month is you start seeing some patterns. It gives you a peek into your authenticity and things that energize you. When your whole body lights up with joy, it’s really trying hard to tell you something—it’s saying, “hey, this is important, please pay attention.”

[…]

You need to spend time understanding who you truly are before you forge a path. If you’re making plans based on other people’s perception of you or the perception of yourself that you want to project based on some external force, you’ll always end up in the wrong place.

Advice to those just starting out on a creative path from Sharon Ann Lee, one of the most brilliant people I know – a fine addition to our ongoing archive of life-advice.

Complement with how to find your purpose and do what you love

(via explore-blog)

-YES- MONTH GOAL-

gretavirginia:

After Kissing120mm filmMarch 2014

gretavirginia:

After Kissing
120mm film

March 2014

Don’t be confused by my apparent
Lack of ceremony, my mind is clear
I may be low or miles high off
In the distance, I want you near

I love you
Even when I’m sleeping
When I close my eyes
You’re everywhere

(Megan Washington doing this song more than justice).

3, 15 & 21. Also your voice is incredible lovely x

3. What was your last thought before going to bed last night?

I was panicking something fierce (i literally thought i had gone mad, i could hear two voices in my head ‘rational Rebecca’ and ‘anxiety Rebecca’). About love. And feeling too much. And it scared me. I think being transparent is my biggest fear. And being stoned just illuminated it bigggg time. Maybe that’s what my container dream was too… I was all wrapped up (in like a white paper kebab wrapper, mind you) and i was lying in a plastic, disposable container and then someone put a lid on me and i start suffocating. But then once i stopped hyperventilating it was warm. 

15. My favourite kind of gum?

I used to like Big Red (the cinnamon flavoured one). But i guess the classic green Extra is a consistent winner. I feel like the best flavoured gums (Juicy Fruit) never last very long…

21. Have you ever wasted your time on someone?

I would like to be honest, and admit that i have definitely felt like i have wasted a lot of words on someone before. I have felt like i have exhausted myself trying to make amends with certain people and/or attempting to make situations ‘right’ many times (i’m thinking of two separate people). That being said, i don’t think it’s a healthy mentality to feel like your words and emotions are wasted, because at that particular time you thought they were constructive and necessary. I guess it’s about accountable to yourself/others and owning/being responsible of your own emotions and words. 

13,23

13. three things i did today: showered at madelynes, jammed two hot cross buns in my housemates toaster and failed to retrieve them safe and sound, made tea/several glasses of water.

23. how have i felt today? my head has felt heavy and my eyes tired and i feel warm (which is unusual for me). i think im getting realz sick. i wanted to feel alive and move a lot today but didnt :(

do you answer all your asks? i've sent you 2 and got no reply :-(
Anonymous

I do, i do answer everything/anything (to the best that i can). That’s so bizarre, maybe they didn’t send through properly? Please do be sure to shoot them through again x

I so wanna be friends with you. But I'm a lame 18 year old. And you're cool like real cool. And your music is mint as. You're great. Much love.
Anonymous

I have pals younger than me! Most of the time, I don’t think that age is really a barrier (but of course this varies from person to person)! I have friends that are eighteen and friends that are thirty-three, but i don’t look at them through an age-lense. And trust me, i’m not cool at all haha! I’m very well flattered though :)

01: tell me the truth, what made you start liking the person you like right now?
02: what on your body is hurting or bothering you?
03: what was your last thought before going to bed last night?
04: what are you listening to?
05: what’s something you’re not looking forward to?
06: where do you think your best friend is right now?
07: have you kissed anybody in the last five days?
08: favorite song ?
09: kiss on the first date?
10: is there one person you want to be with right now?
11: are you seriously happy with where you are in life?
12: is there something you would like to say to someone?
13: what are three things you did today?
14: would you rather sleep at a friend’s or have them over?
15: what is your favorite kind of gum?
16: are you friends with any of your ex boyfriends/ girlfriends?
17: what is on your wrists right now?
18: ever liked someone you thought you didn’t stand a chance with?
19: does anyone have strong feelings for you?
20: are you slowly drifting away from someone?
21: have you ever wasted your time on someone?
22: can you do the alphabet in sign language?
23: how have you felt today?
24: you receive £60 without any reason, what do you spend it on?
25: what is wrong with you right now?
26: is there anyone you’re really disappointed in?
27: would you rather have starbucks or jamba juice right now?
28: why aren’t you in ‘love’ with your last ex anymore?
29: how late did you stay up last night and why?
30: when was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?
31: what were you doing an hour ago?
32: what are you looking forward to in the next month?
33: are you wearing jeans right now?
34: are you a patient person?
35: do you think you can last in a relationship for three months?
36: favorite color?
37: did you have a dream last night?
38: are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants?
39: if someone could be cuddling you right now, who would you want it to be?
40: do you love anyone who is not related to you?
41: if someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
42: do you like meeting new people?
43: are you afraid of falling in love?
44: ever self-harmed or starved yourself?
45: has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes?
46: have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough?
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
ASK ME THINGS l TELL ME THINGS
I'm bed bound and feeling awfully truthful
I've never been stoned but it would be fun with you. X
Anonymous

I remember the first time i got stoned. It was in London. I didn’t feel any different really. I was probably too scared to breathe it in properly though. I was kind of just sleepy (which is normal for me). And I thought it was bad that i couldn’t see the stars (which is also normal for me). But nonetheless, if you’re down, i am haha x

I’m feeling really mopey and heavy today. I’ve got a sore throat and i wanted to busk and run today but i didn’t because i don’t feel very good. As a result i’ve been counting coins, watching Girls and continuing my sift through old images from yesterday, and i came across this. I remember this day so vividly. It was late (ish) last year. It was a difficult year. I had lost so much weight (I know that the photo is awkward/bad though- don’t fret). I had no muscles despite the dramatic weight loss. As a result, i felt really light but i still couldn’t lift myself properly. I just wanted to be pulled. I was really scared too. I want to feel that healthy again though. And comfortable in my clothing. And rock my disco pants (with joggers) whilst rock climbing. Blergggggg. 

I’m feeling really mopey and heavy today. I’ve got a sore throat and i wanted to busk and run today but i didn’t because i don’t feel very good. As a result i’ve been counting coins, watching Girls and continuing my sift through old images from yesterday, and i came across this. I remember this day so vividly. It was late (ish) last year. It was a difficult year. I had lost so much weight (I know that the photo is awkward/bad though- don’t fret). I had no muscles despite the dramatic weight loss. As a result, i felt really light but i still couldn’t lift myself properly. I just wanted to be pulled. I was really scared too. I want to feel that healthy again though. And comfortable in my clothing. And rock my disco pants (with joggers) whilst rock climbing. Blergggggg. 

The last time

I had taken a seat 
In plane that flew over seas
Far away
I promised myself
I would never travel alone 
For a very long time
But here i am picking out another seat

The last time

I had taken a seat

In plane that flew over seas

Far away

I promised myself

I would never travel alone

For a very long time

But here i am picking out another seat

Nawww why didn't you pick me? You're a meanie. X
Anonymous

Ah! Who are you Anonymous? I definitely did forget a lot of lovely and mighty individuals. (INCLUDING my Twinny- tcaaab.tumblr.com). I’m sorry/ily x